Sophinisba Solis (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
sophinisba) wrote2006-07-11 04:44 pm
sophinisba) wrote2006-07-11 04:44 pm
Five Things that Never Happened to Stokely Mitchell, 2: So Eighties
Part 2, mostly gen, PG-13
2.
It's an eighties drug, she says, though she was nine when the eighties ended and, no, she wasn't doing drugs back then. She doesn't do any now, but she has. No needles, nothing up her nose, because that's pathetic and disgusting. And yet somehow she's never had any aversion to swallowing pills, even if the effect is a lot more severe than what Stan and Zeke and Casey are going through now.
She hates Zeke for a few seconds, for insisting on this now, for getting everyone high just now when they need to be at their most alert, to be aware of what's going on. Because it's not just the stuff Delilah and Stan were saying out loud; no one is acting the way they should, and Stokes wants to be sober so she can pay attention to who's not acting like himself. (The hostility is normal. The gun was unexpected, but Zeke and Stan pointing at each other, that's just Zeke and Stan being boys; who's stronger, whose is longer. Casey giggling isn't weird, it's just like Casey when he's not scared, something no one else here has seen before. But Stan looking at Stokes, and not looking mad, that's not normal. Might be they've got Stan.) Or who's not acting like herself. (Delilah hasn't taken it yet. Delilah, if you ignore the fact that she's in the same room with Casey and Zeke and Stokely at all, is acting like her usual self, and Stokes would like to shoot her just for that. And what about Marybeth? No one even knows her. How are we even supposed to know how she should be acting?)
She's angry at Zeke, but then she catches the look on his face as he's watching Casey. It's there for less than a second and she doesn't think Casey's noticed, and it could be even Zeke doesn't realize it himself, but it's there. Zeke looks like a big brother, and looks like a father, and looks like a lover. He wants to protect Casey, wants Casey to be all right (to be himself), wants Casey to trust him. And that look makes Stokely want to trust him too, even though she won't show it. So she still acts annoyed, still acts like she thinks Zeke is an idiot, because she does, but now she thinks he's a well-intentioned idiot and, for that matter, a fool in love, and that makes her willing to follow his lead for the time being. She shrugs, she makes a face, she sticks the thing up her nose and snorts it in.
And at first it's just a shock of pain in her nose and in her eyes, which never happened when she swallowed anything. It takes a little while for the rest of her to feel any different, and when she does, it isn't happy, isn't loose, certainly isn't an urge to join in with Casey and now Stan giggling on the couch. And she doesn't want to be with the other girls and their fucked up rivalry either, and she doesn't trust the boy who gave her this fucking drug, doesn't trust his good intentions with Casey or with her or with this planet.
He could be. She didn't suspect him before, didn't think he was acting differently at all. Because Stan might not have realized Zeke was a science genius but that was only because Stan wasn't paying attention. Stokely hadn't been surprised by anything Zeke had said or done until she saw the way he looked at Casey a minute ago. Only looking again she thinks he looks possessive when he looks at Casey, thinks he looks predatory. Like a cat who wants to play with a mouse, or a scientist ready to dissect him. Or an alien ready to suck out his soul through his ear.
"Don't you touch him," Stokely says, eyes narrowed; and Casey giggles, louder than before. The laugh sounds alien, and it echoes in her ears. She looks at his face and tries to think I've known him since kindergarten but can only think not human, those eyes cannot be human. "What are you laughing at?" she says.
"It's just the scat, Stokely," Zeke says, and she doesn't know if he means the scat making Casey brainless or the scat making her paranoid, and she doesn't care. She doesn't believe him.
Stan's still laughing a little himself, but he gets it under control enough to say, "Stokes, hey, calm down. Zeke's right, it's just the scat. It doesn't affect everybody the same way."
"Don't talk to me like I'm a kid, Stan. You're the dumb jock here."
"Hey, hey." He stands up. He's not steady on his feet, but he starts lurching towards her. "No need to be calling names. You just got a bad hit is all."
Lurching, like a monster, like one not accustomed to this manlike, boylike, Stanlike body. Casey's starting to come out of it, just enough to look at Stokes like he's a little bit scared of her. And why shouldn't he be, really? What does she have to tell her for sure that she's not one of them herself. It could be in the air or the water by now. It could be any of them, all of them.
Stokely picks up the gun.
"Come on, honey, you don't wanna do that."
Marybeth's right next to her, a hand on her shoulder, insinuating. And Stokely realizes then that Marybeth and Delilah still haven't taken the drug. She spins around, trying to shove Marybeth away from her, and while she's distracted Casey grabs the gun from her hand and turns it on Stokely.
"Not me," she says, and she's backing up without thinking, and she bumps into the still and knocks it down.
That's when Zeke says, "She did it on purpose. Shoot her, Casey."
"I didn't, Zeke. It was an accident, I swear."
Then Zeke is yelling at Casey and Stan is yelling at Zeke and Stokely is screaming, crying, and hates herself for not being able to stay calm. Calm and cool like Delilah and Marybeth, waiting for the scene to play out. Stokely tries to look into his eyes. "It's not me, Casey, please, it's not -- "
But she knows it's hopeless. Who's Casey gonna believe, after all? Whose orders is Casey gonna take if not Zeke's? Zeke goes quiet again, "Do it, Casey," and he does.
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2.
It's an eighties drug, she says, though she was nine when the eighties ended and, no, she wasn't doing drugs back then. She doesn't do any now, but she has. No needles, nothing up her nose, because that's pathetic and disgusting. And yet somehow she's never had any aversion to swallowing pills, even if the effect is a lot more severe than what Stan and Zeke and Casey are going through now.
She hates Zeke for a few seconds, for insisting on this now, for getting everyone high just now when they need to be at their most alert, to be aware of what's going on. Because it's not just the stuff Delilah and Stan were saying out loud; no one is acting the way they should, and Stokes wants to be sober so she can pay attention to who's not acting like himself. (The hostility is normal. The gun was unexpected, but Zeke and Stan pointing at each other, that's just Zeke and Stan being boys; who's stronger, whose is longer. Casey giggling isn't weird, it's just like Casey when he's not scared, something no one else here has seen before. But Stan looking at Stokes, and not looking mad, that's not normal. Might be they've got Stan.) Or who's not acting like herself. (Delilah hasn't taken it yet. Delilah, if you ignore the fact that she's in the same room with Casey and Zeke and Stokely at all, is acting like her usual self, and Stokes would like to shoot her just for that. And what about Marybeth? No one even knows her. How are we even supposed to know how she should be acting?)
She's angry at Zeke, but then she catches the look on his face as he's watching Casey. It's there for less than a second and she doesn't think Casey's noticed, and it could be even Zeke doesn't realize it himself, but it's there. Zeke looks like a big brother, and looks like a father, and looks like a lover. He wants to protect Casey, wants Casey to be all right (to be himself), wants Casey to trust him. And that look makes Stokely want to trust him too, even though she won't show it. So she still acts annoyed, still acts like she thinks Zeke is an idiot, because she does, but now she thinks he's a well-intentioned idiot and, for that matter, a fool in love, and that makes her willing to follow his lead for the time being. She shrugs, she makes a face, she sticks the thing up her nose and snorts it in.
And at first it's just a shock of pain in her nose and in her eyes, which never happened when she swallowed anything. It takes a little while for the rest of her to feel any different, and when she does, it isn't happy, isn't loose, certainly isn't an urge to join in with Casey and now Stan giggling on the couch. And she doesn't want to be with the other girls and their fucked up rivalry either, and she doesn't trust the boy who gave her this fucking drug, doesn't trust his good intentions with Casey or with her or with this planet.
He could be. She didn't suspect him before, didn't think he was acting differently at all. Because Stan might not have realized Zeke was a science genius but that was only because Stan wasn't paying attention. Stokely hadn't been surprised by anything Zeke had said or done until she saw the way he looked at Casey a minute ago. Only looking again she thinks he looks possessive when he looks at Casey, thinks he looks predatory. Like a cat who wants to play with a mouse, or a scientist ready to dissect him. Or an alien ready to suck out his soul through his ear.
"Don't you touch him," Stokely says, eyes narrowed; and Casey giggles, louder than before. The laugh sounds alien, and it echoes in her ears. She looks at his face and tries to think I've known him since kindergarten but can only think not human, those eyes cannot be human. "What are you laughing at?" she says.
"It's just the scat, Stokely," Zeke says, and she doesn't know if he means the scat making Casey brainless or the scat making her paranoid, and she doesn't care. She doesn't believe him.
Stan's still laughing a little himself, but he gets it under control enough to say, "Stokes, hey, calm down. Zeke's right, it's just the scat. It doesn't affect everybody the same way."
"Don't talk to me like I'm a kid, Stan. You're the dumb jock here."
"Hey, hey." He stands up. He's not steady on his feet, but he starts lurching towards her. "No need to be calling names. You just got a bad hit is all."
Lurching, like a monster, like one not accustomed to this manlike, boylike, Stanlike body. Casey's starting to come out of it, just enough to look at Stokes like he's a little bit scared of her. And why shouldn't he be, really? What does she have to tell her for sure that she's not one of them herself. It could be in the air or the water by now. It could be any of them, all of them.
Stokely picks up the gun.
"Come on, honey, you don't wanna do that."
Marybeth's right next to her, a hand on her shoulder, insinuating. And Stokely realizes then that Marybeth and Delilah still haven't taken the drug. She spins around, trying to shove Marybeth away from her, and while she's distracted Casey grabs the gun from her hand and turns it on Stokely.
"Not me," she says, and she's backing up without thinking, and she bumps into the still and knocks it down.
That's when Zeke says, "She did it on purpose. Shoot her, Casey."
"I didn't, Zeke. It was an accident, I swear."
Then Zeke is yelling at Casey and Stan is yelling at Zeke and Stokely is screaming, crying, and hates herself for not being able to stay calm. Calm and cool like Delilah and Marybeth, waiting for the scene to play out. Stokely tries to look into his eyes. "It's not me, Casey, please, it's not -- "
But she knows it's hopeless. Who's Casey gonna believe, after all? Whose orders is Casey gonna take if not Zeke's? Zeke goes quiet again, "Do it, Casey," and he does.
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(sorry - you've rendered me incapable of a coherent comment)
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Really wrenching, because we see it so much from her eyes that it's like getting it done to us!
no subject
Stokely, of course, is observing things for me here. My reading of the Casey/Zeke dynamic changes from minute to minute. And protective versus possessive can be a pretty fine line anyway.
Thank you again for your awesome feedback, Aprilkat!